Let’s be honest... it takes more than just the typical cheesy pick up line to actually land your #couplegoals partner these days. In a world with endless opportunities to swipe left or swipe right we find ourselves somewhat spoilt for choice. 

We find ourselves constantly competing and have the need to be the next best thing to gain that perfect partner but in the end the truth is, it’s easiest to just be yourself and that persona you once thought you could keep up dies because it’s too hard. This doesn’t mean “yourself” can’t also be improved or tweaked though as we all need some help sometimes.

I must admit, I do tend to people watch, I am selectively observant, and I just admire the subject of emotional intelligence. From my experiences as the occasional Hitch it’s allowed me a little insight into the female mind. Through my interaction with the opposite sex whether that be with friends, lovers, or family and having countless DNMs with females at various walks of life I’ve come up with some traits which I think may help you fellas get your foot in the door. If you pay attention to these basics, it will already put you one step ahead to attract or continually stay attractive to your ‘bae’, haha.

Smell

Woman love a man who smells good. I’m sure you’ve heard it many times, and that’s because it’s true. There is a certain scent that women are always drawn to and it’s that “real man smell”. Honestly, I can’t describe what it is but it’s a so called “fanny flutter generator.” So guys, smell good, stay fresh, keep the hygiene in check because the last thing you need is to walk around with bad body odour. And please don’t go overkill with your cologne either, just a spray or two will do the trick. 

Emotion

Showing emotion isn’t a weakness, it doesn’t showcase a lack of masculinity, but it exemplifies that you’re genuine. Women don’t want a robot that has little to no feelings. Express enthusiasm if you’re excited about something, if you’re frustrated or depressed, it’s okay to display it. Women won’t see it as being negative, they’ll admire the fact that you are comfortable around them and have a sense of trust in them, it shows you can be the real you in front of them.  In my opinion, if they do see it as a negative trait maybe she just isn’t someone that is right for you. You don’t ever want to be stuck in a relationship where you can’t be real with one another.

Style 

Every woman will have their own taste and preference on how they want their men to dress. But as long as you know how to put a decent outfit together and show that a good amount of effort was involved to look presentable, that’s a tick on their list. Also, make sure you’re dressed appropriately for the situation. If it’s a formal occasion, leave the Off-White gear at home. Women can easily scan you from head to toe just like how us men can do the same except they pay attention to details. 

Positivity 

No one wants to be around constant negativity. A guy with a positive attitude in life is an attractive trait. Women see it as comforting, yet fun to be around. However, don’t just pretend to be positive either. Women have better senses than us, and they will be able to tell if you are trying to win an Award for The Best Motivational Speaker. Look at it this way, sometimes it takes more effort to be fake than to just be real, you can’t keep it up forever, it gets tiring.

Grooming 

Gone are the days where men are low maintenance with their hygiene so they can appear masculine. Taking care of your hygiene is a must in modern society. So, whether that be manscaping, regular haircuts, having a skin routine, do it. Trust me, the ladies like men who groom and 100% appreciate the effort. A bit of scruff can still be seen as attractive but maintain it and don’t let it go wild. Don’t be ashamed, I literally have haircuts every week, and I love it. It makes me feel clean and confident. 

Drive

I’m not talking about the car you drive, even though it can be a factor in some women’s attraction towards you, but it’ materialistic and short term, they’ll get over it and there will always be something better. When I say drive, I’m talking about having direction in life. You don’t have to have clear cut goals or know exactly what you want to achieve in life but just have some form of direction. Whether you’re working to bettering yourself or ticking off goals, it all still counts. If they are a bit indecisive in life you might also inspire them on their drive and achieving their goals. 

Chivalry 

Chivalry should be far from dead. We live in a world where there’s an increase amount of egotism and entitlement, but it doesn’t mean we should throw away our courtesy and manners. You don’t have to smother women with being a gentleman, but they will appreciate you being thoughtful such as offering your jacket if it’s cold, opening doors or remembering small details from past conversations and actively listening. Being “old school” will help you stand out from others which don’t do it because they are too prideful. There’s a continuous strive for gender equality, and women to be more empowered and independent in modern society, which is great, but women still admire certain chivalrous traits from a man.